a prayer.

To do this right, I cant do this without you. I want so badly to take hold and do this on my own. I asked you for more knowledge and to teach me more, and I thank you for doing that. Being honest, its hard. Hard to know you and understand who you were and who you are, what youve done and how it matches with the rest of scripture. Im lost. Clear my thoughts. Clear my mind. I feel so incompetent and unworthy right now. Erase these negative thoughts. Fill them with Your Truth and your clarity. //Why do i have to be the one to stick up for friends? Why do i have to be the strong one? I take that on myself, and I know that. But who will defend them if I wont? Arent they worthy of defending and of character verification? Why cant i be that person? Why cant i help them? Why do i always have to feel the effects of backing up my friends?